Hi friends,
My divorce in 2015 did not align with the narrative arc I had planned for myself. It was absolutely the true choice, and it was also a humbling curveball.
In the 6 months preceding the decision, my former husband and I devoted ourselves to a therapeutic container-- the first time I had ever invested any money at all in looking at my patterns in relationship.
As I met our therapist's questions and received his reflections, I felt like... a baby. I was shocked to meet the truth: I understood very little about the inner workings of my heart, my patterns, my wounds in intimacy and how they were showing up. I left his office each week dumbstruck and also on fire.
Those sessions helped us reach crystal clarity and navigate divorce in a good way (a dream of a process, in the end, with very little drama and a lot of mutual understanding). If 6 months of therapy could do THAT, what would be possible with deeper study and more investment?
In the ten years since, I have invested multiple (MULTIPLE) six figures in increasing my relational intelligence. In 2015 alone, I hired not one but TWO high-level relationship coaches to the tune of $35K (which was beyond stretch-y, as I was newly faced with standing on my own two feet financially).
I remember saying to myself: "if my car broke down tomorrow and the mechanic told me I needed $10k to fix it, I would figure that out. Why would I not do that in service to my own HEART?"
As it goes, my commitment changed everything.
Back then: I began dating as a more raw, real version of myself. This produced new depths of experience: both shadow-y (that painful and confusing on-again-off-again dance with a narcissist, woof) and light (the safest and most healing dynamic with a man who loved me so well for 2 years and is a dear friend and ally to this day).
Because I had support and mentorship, I learned through all of it. Digested the lessons, alchemized the patterns, kept digging for the next layer of truth. I also decided: I'm never going back.
And now: I still pay two different mentors monthly to hold space for me in my relational development, and I don't know what I would do without them.
Choosing to invest in something takes both courage and humility-- putting your resources towards something like you mean it, while also admitting how much you have to learn.
It's certainIy easier to invest money and time into those pursuits prioritized by society these days -- making the money, getting the botox, having the aspirational home decor.
But none of that is going to change your life in the way becoming skillful in relationship will.
The Lovers Collective closes in two days. If you're wondering if it's worth the investment, I'm here to say-- I went first, and it made all the difference.
The Lovers' Collective
The miraculous relief of creating the love, sex and relationships you've always dreamed of.
|
The vulnerable plunge of wanting more.
The risk of investing in your heart.
The courage to say "I don't know what I don't know."
All of this is the precursor to your highest aliveness. And if your'e ready, I've got you.
Doors close April 1. Here's hoping I see you inside...
Big love,
PS: If you don't want to continue receiving emails about The Lovers Collective, click here!
